Things change

He of the Quad Extra Large shirt has long desired a choice of decent small locally owned, non chain, places to buy a meal. Shouldn't be a great deal to ask for. For a time there was Hawkins Burger, excellent food, if the wait was from here to eternity. Of course, there is Jim's Burger on Lincoln. One of the best burgers in the world, but even lobster ,if eaten every night, eventually gets boring, and while Jim's is the best of the grease burgers, how many can one eat a year and not need an unplanned visit with a cardiologist?.

A long time ago, back when he of the multi chins only had one and a half of them, he and Josephine went to Fair Oaks Burger. The Fat man was impressed with Fair Oaks Burger some twenty one years ago on that visit, but not in a positive way. The food was, on that visit, salty enough to cross ones eyes, and even that could not distract from how dirty with deep ancient gritty grime the place was. The fat man didn't get sick that night, but this was evidence of favor with a merciful God.

There is nothing that makes his chubbyness more dizzy with disgust than a absolutely filthy diner. For the last twenty years he drove past on his way home or his way to and from East Altadena and his bones shivered with the thought of the massive armies of microbes billeted at the place.

A few months ago Fair Oaks Burger went up for sale. His chunkyness thought "Who in their right mind would buy this run down ptomaine tank?" He also wondered how it ever survived, the Fat Man never saw a single person patronizing the joint. What could the books possibly look like? No chance of any "blue sky" there. Some brave courageous soul did buy it. They cleaned it up. You can see through the windows now. The kitchen is bright and sparkly. The sign is even new and un yellowed.

The lovely Jeanette kept attempting to get the Rotund One to give Fair Oaks Burger a try. He didn't, the memories of the filthy kitchen were strong. One night Jeanette said she was going to go get us dinner at a new place she knew about. She went to the drive thru and arrived at home with two Fair Oaks Burger combinations. She didn't tell the Fat Man what it was. He was hungry having spent the day building driveway gates for a client in his studio.

The burger was a nice earthy thick coarse ground beef patty cooked to just this side of well done, a lovely fresh bakery bun, fresh lettuce, a tomato bursting with redness and a rich acidic flavor, a sharp slice of onion, avacado, American cheese, secret sauce, and jalipenos. It was some SERIOUS GOOD EATING. She had he of the extra heft at the fries though. They were steak fries. Large rectangular in section, crispy at the edges and dreamy soft in the interior. Perfect fries. The Fat man was happy and demanded to know where this new place was. Jeanette being ever the Imp, waited a nano second and a half and with a big sparkle in her eye said "Fair Oaks Burger".

So over the next couple weeks The Fat Man went through the menu, American food, Mexican food, Chinese food. Friends, it's hard to believe, but Fair Oaks Burger makes each and all of these well. The combination bowl of beef, chicken, shrimp, carrots, broccoli, bean sprouts, mushrooms and steamed rice is fresh a symphony of flavors that sing seperately and together, and as good as any Chinese food you nwill find for less than twenty bucks a plate. Good stuff.

The Chicken Taco plate is two tacos literally so full of chicken, lettuce and tomato that its work to keep it all together and in the soft shell as one attempts to enjoy the flavors and textures.

The Carne Asada burrito could give lessons to many a sit down Mexican place, many with long standing pedigees and reputations. It's just a hefty excellent combination of well marinated beef cooked to jucy on the inside, ccrispy on teh edges, fluffly brown rice, well seasoned tender beans, cheese, onions, tomato and cilantro in a flour tortillia whose structural integrety is strained by this filling. And its good so so so very good.

Jeanette and the Fat Man even had a salad one evening. He had a excellent Cobb Salad, she had a Chinese Chicken Salad. Both were the equal of any salad they have ever had at a price that these days seems like stealing.

It's true, the drive through is a bit slow. That's because the food is made to order, so drive up order, turn off your engine, listen to the radio and get a good fresh meal!

The Fat man has a new haunt near his own house, If you see a Black 1938 Buick stop by and say hi.

Fair Oaks Burger
2560 N. Fair Oaks (the north east corner of Fair Oaks and Calaveras)
Cash and plastic accepted.
Monday - Saturday 7 am- 8 pm
Closed Sunday.

Phone orders 398 3630